The beauty of the moment

If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change, says Wayne Dyer. These are remarkable words.

Ever wonder why we look at things the way we do. Did someone or a concept condition us? An incident for some could be looked at as a problem and for others it could be a solution — just the way we perceive makes the difference.

A fall is enough to bring you down to a flow of self pity, but it could also have been what revealed the underlying problems.

Charles R Swindall says, “Life is 10 per cent what happens to you, and 90 per cent how you react to it.”

But the funny thing is at times no matter how hard we prepare for a change and plan to be shockproof, a sudden occurrence can still leave us tripping out of balance and soon we are in varying modes of reaction.

But our capacity depends on how fast we can bounce back into reality. It might seem it is a question of having the ability to connect and disconnect. Disconnect so we can evaluate the situation and not be carried away by a whirlpool of emotions. We come across many people who are calm and collected.

Late Sheikh Khalfan al Esry, Islamic scholar and life coach, used to say accept the situation and then you will come up with the solution. One must try it and that is when we realise the amount of time we waste in rejecting and complaining about a situation that has already taken place. Accepting reality gives us the power to move on.

When we move on, we need to heal too or we just continue to carry our emotional baggage around.

When we go to the airport, the airlines weigh our luggage and insist on limiting the weight and that too specifically for each baggage. So imagine when it comes to emotional baggage we have been carrying not for a flight but for years. What really could be happening would be us missing many opportunities simply because we are blind toward them as our mind is preoccupied to register the present moment.

Before we know the people around us disappear too. And you are left in a vacuum remembering the questions you wanted to ask and the answers you will never know now.

We don’t appreciate the fact that we have this moment now to create a beautiful memory, and life continues to teach us the power of now. And that reminds us of the renowned author of the book Power of Now, Eckhart Tolle. The book has been an inspiration for many people. A friend carries it in her car all the time and it often reminds her of the main message of the book — to live in the moment.

So how is it that some people have the enlightenment and others don’t?

While we move from one emotional reaction to another, there are some who have been looking for answers and have found solutions and have been practicing. But even to reach a stage of having the strength to attempt to do what advisers guide us to do requires a certain amount of inner strength. If one is not in the right frame of mind it is not quite possible to go through the step by step process of answering the questions to practice living in the moment.

Then there are people who believe in having Plan A, Plan B, and Plan C. They are the planners and are ready to catch the next plan if there are unexpected surprises. While others take a beating of disappointment, the planners just take out their next proposal. The planners save energy on emotions spent on disappointment.

A friend recently said giving much comfort - rest assured that if you lose one opportunity, or a person, ‘You will surely be given something else or somebody.’

Our childhood shapes us but then we are in a protective environment. Then comes the time we have to interact with the world to create our own path. We rush to qualify ourselves to be accepted by others and prove ourselves. But between childhood and adulthood we forget the art of living in the moment.

We have better coping skills when we are children. We pick up languages without too much exertion. But as we get older, we compete to create a mark for ourselves and then somewhere along we realise the importance of mindfulness. The importance of living in the moment.

And when we let go of our preconceived notions, we begin to admire the true beauty in others and accept them fully.