Don’t treat her like a fly

Last night while walking at one of the beaches in town, I saw a group of men sitting by the sea in a semi-circle. I knew most of them very well and thus went to greet them.
They welcomed me and immediately demanded an answer to their so called ‘simple’ question. There question was, “What should a good husband do?”
They asked me this question because they see me write in this newspaper and thought that I am an expert in marriage relationship. Although I am not, I still somehow gave my answer.
I told them, “Don’t treat her like a fly”. Some of them stared surprisingly, others laughed loudly while others shook their heads in admiration. Of course I had to explain what I meant.
We never think about a fly in our daily lives until it ‘bugs’ us. Similarly, a wife will do well all day – which brings no attention from the husband — until she does something to ‘bug’ him.
I told this group of men never to treat their wives like this. I told them to always recognize all the good that she does and focus on that. As I stood up to go my way, all of them, unanimously and enormously, asked me to tell them more. I agreed and took the honour. I told them so many things that if I were to write them down here, I wouldn’t finish. I will just concentrate on the main few.
I told them that a man should always make a point and thank his wife for all that she does for him. Then thank her again! Take for example a dinner at your house. She makes the food, cleans the table, and a dozen other tasks to prepare it. And sometimes the only acknowledgment she receives is that there needed to be more salt in the soup. Don’t let that be; thank her! And do it from the bottom of your heart.
Wives love good nicknames; use the best names for your wife. Call your wife by the most beloved names to her, and avoid using names that hurt her feelings. Dress up for your wife, look clean and smell good. Men should learn going shopping for designer pajamas. Just like the husband wants his wife to look nice for him, she also wants her husband to dress up for her too. I told my fellow husbands to master one technique that many men have failed to acquire. If you see something wrong with your wife, try being silent and do not comment! This works wonders just like a long term investment. Smile at your wife whenever you see her and embrace her often. A good husband should be humorous and even hilarious and of course men have to find time to play games with their wives.
A wife is always at the service of the husband. The things like home management, tutoring, ferrying the kids, caring, cooking, cleaning, washing, working, you name it, she is doing it. But what about the husband? What they do exactly for their wives? Think about it.

Nizar al Musalmy
nizar.nmh.musalmy@gmail.com

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